Examining Your Own Behavior

As we discussed in Chapter 1, over commitment is a significant contributor to workplace stress. While some external factors, such as tight deadlines and heavy workloads, are beyond your control, it’s important to remember that you do have agency over your own behavior. In this chapter, we’ll explore how setting boundaries and communicating limitations can help you manage your workload and reduce stress.

Understanding the Importance of Boundaries

Setting boundaries at work involves establishing clear guidelines around what you are willing and able to do. This can include defining your work hours, your role within the organization, and your priorities.

Here are some benefits of setting boundaries:

• Helps you prioritize tasks and manage your time more effectively
• Reduces the likelihood of being asked to take on tasks that are not part of your job description
• Helps you maintain a healthy work-life balance
• Can lead to increased respect from colleagues and managers

On the other hand, failing to set boundaries can lead to several negative outcomes, including:

• Over commitment and feeling overwhelmed
• Difficulty focusing on tasks that are most important
• Burnout and physical and mental health issues

Learning to Say ‘No’

One of the most important skills for managing your workload is learning to say “no” to tasks that are beyond your capacity. Saying “no” can be difficult, especially when you want to be seen as a team player or when you feel that saying “no” might jeopardize your job security.

However, saying “yes” to everything can lead to burnout, resentment, and decreased productivity.

Here are some strategies for saying “no” effectively:

• Be honest and direct. Explain your reasons for declining the task.
• Offer alternatives. If you can’t take on a particular task, suggest someone else who might be able to help.
• Say “not now.” If you’re too busy at the moment, but think you could take on the task at a later time, suggest postponing it.
• Use “I” statements. For example, “I would love to help, but I’m currently working on a deadline.”

Setting Realistic Expectations

Managing expectations is a crucial part of setting boundaries and saying “no” effectively. It’s important to communicate your limitations to your colleagues and managers, and to be clear about what you can and can’t do.

Here are some tips for setting realistic expectations:

• Be proactive. Don’t wait until you’re already overwhelmed to communicate your limits.
• Prioritize tasks. Be clear about which tasks are most important and why.
• Be specific. Instead of saying “I can’t do that,” explain why you can’t do it and suggest an alternative.
• Be consistent. If you set boundaries, stick to them. Consistency is key to building respect and trust with your colleagues and managers.

Examples

Here are some examples of how to use these strategies in practice:

• A colleague asks you to take on a task that you don’t have the bandwidth for. Instead of saying “no” outright, explain that you’re currently working on a deadline and suggest someone else who might be able to help.
• Your boss asks you to work overtime on a project. Instead of saying “yes” right away, explain that you have other commitments and suggest an alternative timeline.
• You have too many tasks on your plate and are feeling overwhelmed. Instead of soldiering on, take a break and practice some self-care techniques, such as taking a walk or doing a short meditation.